Its official: bottoms and bosoms are out and thighs are where it's at.
Personally, I'm waiting for forearms to be "in", but it may take a while. Besides, I'm nothing if not a bandwagon gal, so when my chums came round for a meal/crate of wine/general screech we found ourselves disrobing to see how we measured up on the general wobble factor of a body part previously skirted around.
All women hate their thighs: it's the prime location for the dreaded c-word to take up uninvited residence and become a tiresome sitting tenant. Cellulite is just fat in a slightly different form, but it is hormonally connected and therefore seems to affect women far more than men. You also (I find this pleasing) don't have to be overweight to have it. As someone who goes from fatter to thinner and back with alarming regularity, I can tell you that cellulite is greatly reduced by the following: not smoking, not drinking booze or caffeine, sensible eating, regular exercise, and drinking as much water as you can stomach in order to flush out the toxins. Follow this to the letter, and you will have beautiful, undimpled thighs that you will be forced to keep to yourself as nobody will find you remotely interesting and you will be crossed off the party register.
So, how to have thighs you don't mind uncrossing a la Sharon Stone -and a life? Well, for a start, we have to change the terminology, eg, you no longer have thunder thighs; instead, you have recently acquired "strong thighs", which sounds instantly more appealing and puts you in the same bracket as Beyonce, J.Lo and Pink, three pop icons whose legs do not resemble pipe cleaners.
From my recent girly research, the main factor in acceptable thighdom seems to be length of bone from knee to hip. If you are lucky enough to have a decent sized femur, then you are truly blessed. As we know, a shorter lower leg can be disguised with a dizzying array of agonising stilettos, but above the knee, you're on your own. High-cut pants gave us short-femur folk some respite, but don't even think about stockings, as they will make you look like a badly squeezed tube of Matteson's pate. The longer the femur, the greater the width of thigh you can get away with.
In my focus group of five women, upper-thigh circumference varied from 15in to 28in. I wouldn't recommend you aim for 28in if you're only 4ft 11in, but it can look splendidly Amazonian on a six-footer.
After our fearless measuring, we set about each others' thighs with loofahs, dimpled-rubber massagers and hard-bristled brushes (Thigh Spy starring yours truly now available on DVD) until our legs were sore and crimson and we could see an improvement in circulation as the veins were revealed by the distinct lack of skin.
We then declared ourselves gorgeous, opened another bottle and ordered an Indian takeaway. As Angie Best once said, "You'll never be as young as you are today," so enjoy the best days of your thighs.
All women hate their thighs: it's the prime location for the dreaded c-word to take up uninvited residence and become a tiresome sitting tenant. Cellulite is just fat in a slightly different form, but it is hormonally connected and therefore seems to affect women far more than men. You also (I find this pleasing) don't have to be overweight to have it. As someone who goes from fatter to thinner and back with alarming regularity, I can tell you that cellulite is greatly reduced by the following: not smoking, not drinking booze or caffeine, sensible eating, regular exercise, and drinking as much water as you can stomach in order to flush out the toxins. Follow this to the letter, and you will have beautiful, undimpled thighs that you will be forced to keep to yourself as nobody will find you remotely interesting and you will be crossed off the party register.
So, how to have thighs you don't mind uncrossing a la Sharon Stone -and a life? Well, for a start, we have to change the terminology, eg, you no longer have thunder thighs; instead, you have recently acquired "strong thighs", which sounds instantly more appealing and puts you in the same bracket as Beyonce, J.Lo and Pink, three pop icons whose legs do not resemble pipe cleaners.
From my recent girly research, the main factor in acceptable thighdom seems to be length of bone from knee to hip. If you are lucky enough to have a decent sized femur, then you are truly blessed. As we know, a shorter lower leg can be disguised with a dizzying array of agonising stilettos, but above the knee, you're on your own. High-cut pants gave us short-femur folk some respite, but don't even think about stockings, as they will make you look like a badly squeezed tube of Matteson's pate. The longer the femur, the greater the width of thigh you can get away with.
In my focus group of five women, upper-thigh circumference varied from 15in to 28in. I wouldn't recommend you aim for 28in if you're only 4ft 11in, but it can look splendidly Amazonian on a six-footer.
After our fearless measuring, we set about each others' thighs with loofahs, dimpled-rubber massagers and hard-bristled brushes (Thigh Spy starring yours truly now available on DVD) until our legs were sore and crimson and we could see an improvement in circulation as the veins were revealed by the distinct lack of skin.
We then declared ourselves gorgeous, opened another bottle and ordered an Indian takeaway. As Angie Best once said, "You'll never be as young as you are today," so enjoy the best days of your thighs.